David Cameron: The all-new 'ministering angel'

Florence Nightingale, the English nurse made famous for her work in the Crimean War, is widely referred to as the Lady with the Lamp. To readers of the Times, however, she was known as the "ministering angel".

"Her slender form glides quietly along each corridor, every poor fellow's face softens with gratitude at the sight of her," the newspaper's Crimean War correspondent said at the time.

I arrived in Cheltenham this morning, where there was a letter waiting for me from Conservative party leader David Cameron. It came with an accompanying leaflet, A World Class NHS, featuring Mr Cameron, left arm outstretched, laughing with an elderly female patient.

Behind Dave's head is a fluorescent light - each end equidistant from the centre of his brow. He is smiling and above his head, it appears, is a glowing halo.

The out-of-shot hand at the end of said outstretched arm, I can only imagine, contains some yummy medicine to make it all better for the little old lady.

Opening up the leaflet, and Mr Cameron has clearly been doing the rounds in the hospital, talking to a number of patients and nurses.

The Tory party's pre-election PR machine has created its own ministering angel, the saviour of the NHS:

"DAVID CAMERON'S slender form glides quietly along each corridor, every poor fellow's face softens with gratitude at the sight of DAVID CAMERON."

Away from hospitals, Cameron has appeared pretty keen on all things green and the safeguarding of Britain's natural environment - something that intensified as Gordon Brown was about to become prime minister.

Why then, I wonder, did my family's household receive five identical letters and leaflets? 

Because it accommodates five people aged 18 and over and therefore five eligible voters.

Don't worry about the trees Dave - bombard each individual with the same information and maybe we'll vote for you. Actually, sorry, we can't, because we don't live in Witney.

Pic credit: University Hospitals Birmingham