ES-PAN-YA

So, Spain won the World Cup - and I was in Spain! Which was great, apart from I was in a resort called Puerto Pollensa in Mallorca, so it wasn't really España at all. More Basildon/Glasgow (judging by the accents, which were two separate ones, not some Essex-Glaswegian hybrid, although that is something I would like to hear).

A guy in the bar around the corner asked me how I was finding the Spanish commentary. Trouble was, I was watching the game in the main square, Placa Capllonch, which had big screens with shaky pictures of BBC1's coverage. So instead of some exuberant Spanish commentator shouting "GOOOOOOL" in ecstasy, I had Guy Mowbray, who to his credit tried to sound excited during Iniesta's late winner, only to be undermined by Mark Lawrenson: "Yeah, well errr, well done Cesc Fabregas."

At the final whistle I tried to get a rendition of 'Championies, Championies' going, but it was echoed only by a few Scottish accents - it's a song that clearly hasn't caught on in southern Europe. Instead, it was ES-PAN-YA! ES-PAN-YA!, some expensive cocktails and a night on the beach. An expensive, slightly sandy, buenas noches.